A Funeral during Lockdown 2020

Amidst these chaotic times, I have finally completed my Bachelor’s degree in Electronics and communications and as usual, to celebrate this and every other milestone I followed my instincts to call my grandparents. But this time it was different.

The year 2020 has amazed me, I mean I haven’t expected something this bizarre, what this year has shown us so far. The year started off with some shocking news. Just twenty-five days after her 81st birthday, my Dadi (my grandmother) left Baba (my grandfather) and us to be at someplace better.

Baba, Dadi and me.

This article highlights the point how unpredictable life is and also tells us about a beautiful and strong bond between my grandparents which I wish I could have too with my other half, someday.

Dadi and her Grandchildren

January of 2020

So my Dadi was diagnosed with final stage liver cancer and the doctors have said to avoid any kind of operation as it would just worsen the situation. Soon after this news, Dadi lost all her hopes, and eventually succumbed to this disease.

She was a fighter — One of the first and I guess only Girls scout in our family, and that too back in the 1950s — and really an inspirational woman who has raised all of her children to be a successful person today.

Her best friend (My Baba) and she were inseparable. Starting their morning routine with tea and some rusk, to ending the day by listening to Vaishno Devi’s Bhajans, they did almost everything together.

Baba wouldn’t show anyone but he really cared about Dadi the most in this world. He couldn’t tolerate the fact of her being away from his line of sight even for a tad bit of time.

Baba and Dadi

But when Dadi left us, Baba was broken. He stopped following his daily routine, which he followed for nearly 50 years, stopped moving on his own and would only watch those live shows just for the sake of watching.

The Pandemic

In between all this, the pandemic hit us all bad and in a blink of an eye, we were all locked inside our homes. Limited food supply, with no contact from the outer world — well yes people took the lockdown pretty seriously when it all started — we were all stuck inside our own homes.

Amidst all the chaos Baba too left his physical abode. Everyone was shattered and We were clueless about how to arrange the funeral. Neither anyone can go outside the house nor anyone can enter it— this was mid-May when the alertness was at the peak but the pandemic wasn’t — and the only way to hold the funeral was to do it via the internet.

Well yes, you read it right. I could have never imagined there would be a time like this when you will need to hold a ceremony as important as this one, online.

This was very different from Dadi’s funeral where we were able to arrange ‘poojas’ and ‘bhoj’. This had only 6–8 people working in the house, doing most of the things and rest of them doing their work following the social distancing norms. It felt utterly weird especially to hold all the ceremonies via the Internet so that all of our family members would see Baba for one last time.

Baba left us exactly 108 days after Dadi died. Well if you don’t know the importance of the number 108 in Hinduism then:

In Hindu tradition, the Mukhya Shivaganas (attendants of Shiva) are 108 in number and hence Shaiva religions, particularly Lingayats, use malas of 108 beads for prayer and meditation. Similarly, in Gaudiya Vaishnavism, Lord Krishna in Brindavan had 108 followers known as gopis.

Basically this meant something and we were not surprised, as Baba surely had that stout bond with Dadi, I would just say they indeed were inseparable. Baba loved Dadi and his family the most, he would call each of his grandchildren to get updates whether it being academics or his/her well-being. He would call me to ask whether I have boarded the flight when I travelled or reached my hostel on time while I was in college. I will surely miss his early morning call to give blessings on my 22nd birthday this year.

Baba’s Birthday — Jan 2019

The Conclusion

I just hope we have served both Baba and Dadi to what they deserved to get. This experience was unforeseen, unwelcomed and appalling to an unprecedented extent but has also taught my family and me to be open-minded and to be ready for any kind of situation life challenges us with.

Also, I wish someday I can have a relationship just like my Baba and Dadi’s, as this is my ideal version of the perfect relationship. I miss both of them but just hope they are happy, wherever they are.

In the loving memory of Late Shri Binod Sinha and Smt. Prema Sinha